Sunday, September 27, 2015

A Return to Normality


After ten months of mostly silence from this computer, I want to greet all of you with a joyous “Hello!!!” I hope you are well and that the past year brought you great growth in the human spirit of compassion both toward others and yourself.
         I planned on posting a memoir story today, but as I am more and more aware of—Man proposes, but God disposes. That saying is sexist and doesn’t reflect my present theology but it does sum up the lack of control any of us have over the vicissitudes of our lives.
         So instead of posting a new story today, I’m simply posting a recent exchange between Arleen and myself. As many of you know, she is a friend over at Starting Over, Accepting Changes. Her blog name nails where I am in my life right now.
         Last Saturday—September 20, 2015—Arleen wrote the following comment on my blog: Dear Dee, please let us know if you are OK. So many of us are concerned. You have made an imprint on our lives.
This, of course, touched me deeply as I’ve been away from blogging—reading and commenting on your stories and writing my own—for so long that I’m amazed people remember my writing and me.


So I immediately wrote the following response to Arleen’s welcomed comment: Dear Arleen, thank you for this note of concern and also for the one in June. I want to assure you that I am okay. Since I last posted . . . I have had one health concern after another. The most recent involved "high dose" radiation, which was effective and successful. 


However, all this has left me very tired. Weary actually of dealing with these tedious blips in my life. The good news for me is that I am now going to take up the reins of my life again and return to a daily routine. That means that I will continue to work on my convent memoir, look for an agent, and . . . begin to read and comment on blogs again as well as post stories of my own.
. . .  I've missed knowing what was happening in the lives of people—like you—whom I've come to care about. And so I'm eager to begin reading about what's going on in the wide world beyond my own home where I've spent so much time in the past ten months. I am so touched by your concern.          
           Truly all is well. And as Julian of Norwich said from her anchorage so many centuries ago: "And all shall be well. And all shall be well. And all manner of things shall be exceedingly well." 


I hope that you, too, are well. I will be eighty on April 1 next year and I'm thinking that this past year with all these health concerns has simply provided the measure for how wonderful the next decade will be. I look forward to more and better writing and to embracing the possibilities that the future holds for me to embrace growth in every way.
Let us both be gracious to ourselves. Peace.
If all goes well, I plan to begin reading blogs again tomorrow—Monday the 28th. I’m not going to pressure myself next week to get to every blog I follow. I do plan, however, to read several each day until I’ve reacquainted myself with each of you.
I’m not sure if any of you whom I used to follow are reading this posting right now. If you are, please leave a comment. Let me know if there are any postings or any series of posting in the past ten months you’d like me to read. I don’t have the time or energy to read everything you’ve posted during this past year, but I would like to know the highlights—and lows—of your lives.
In my first posting, I meant to share the highs and lows of my own life since last November. But on reflection I realized that no sane person would want to spend time with me as I droned on about ten month’s of ill health. So just be assured that, as I said to Arleen, “All is well.” And I so hope that all is well with you.
Peace. 

68 comments:

  1. Dearest Dee, welcome back. You have been sorely missed. It will be good to read your words again. :) Take you time in reading posts. Remember, they are all there for each of us that write. As for me, I had a summer of gardens and flowers, caterpillars, monarchs and grandchildren. You are now caught up, but, welcome at the Cutoff any time. Peace to you.

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  2. Dear Penny, I wasn't sure that anyone would know I'd posted, so your comment came as a relief to anxiety. Thank you. I have looked at Facebook every so often in the past ten months and I did see your reflections there. Your photographs of nature always fill me with longing to live back on the farm where I grew up. And yes, to see flowers and caterpillars and monarchs. If only I'd resume gardening--a passion when I lived in Stillwater, Minnesota--I could see all that again! I always seem to dream more than I actually bring into reality! Peace.

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    1. Hi, Dee. I am so sorry to hear the reason you have been away. I am glad that the treatments you have endured were worth it and that they have been successful. I lost my mother at the end of July and so I have been down to KC several times and each time I keep meaning to get in touch with you but miss doing it because my time is always so short and there is always so much to be done while I am there. Her passing was a blessing for her and she didn't suffer in any way. Just sat down on her bed and then left us. Next time I come down I won't have her many issues on my plate so I will have more time to visit others. I hope that I can come see you some day. Meanwhile, I am happy you are back on line and it is so good to know you are okay. Love & Light, Sara

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    2. Dear Sara, I did see on Facebook that your mother had died and I hoped that your grief might be tempered a little by the fact that she was no longer living with suffering. Please do let me know when you are in the area. I'd love to visit with you and recall together our Minnesota connection. Peace. And thank you for both love and light.

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  3. Wonderful to see you posting again, Dee and to know you again feel well enough to do so. I've been a rather dilatory blogger recently, but hope to get back into a regular routine now that autumn is here. My year stared with a broken wrist, but has included time away, time with family and time for new interests, so a good year overall. :)

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    1. Dear Perpetua, three comments/readers! I'm feeling fortunate today. I had hoped that at least five readers would find my blog today and you make three. So now I'm going to read the newspaper from cover to cover. I was aware that you'd broken your wrist. I so hope you are back to making music.

      And I see from today's facebook that you are now a member of the Labour party. I'm not sure what that means historically because I'm negligent about keeping up with British politics. But your facebook postings during these months have really reflected what I've been feeling and thinking about the world in which we live right now. I'm glad you are "actively" posting about all this. Peace.

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  4. I am so happy to see you here on Blogger again, Dee. There is no need to try to catch up on past posts. Stay with the present as that is where we are and that is where we can find you.

    Welcome back, dear lady, you were missed!

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    1. Dear Arleen, you really are the impetus for my starting again. So thank you. And thank you also for encouraging me to live in the present. I've been trying to do that all these months, and so with your encouragement I'll continue and just start to read the blogs with the last posting on them. I've missed you, too, Arleen. Peace.

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  5. Welcome, welcome, welcome. I'm glad you are up to reporting again. As for me, it's still grandchildren, friends, birds, flowers. And a complete remodel of my 6 x 8 foot bathroom, and I love it, too. Looking forward t tomorrow.

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    1. Dear Joanne, I've thought of you so often in the past months because your two red/white towels hang in on kitchen. One on the refrigerator handle and one on the stove/range handle. Each time I use them I remember you and your generosity to me.

      A complete remodel. I did that once on about the same size bathroom and oh the difference! Peace.

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  6. Hi Dee, I have recently returned to blogging myself and was wondering if all was well with you. I've really become and on/off again type of blogger, but I do think of my bloggy friends often. Reading the other comments, I see that you lost your mother. My condolences....

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    1. Dear Turquoise Moon, I got the responses messed up above in that I didn't hit the right bottom and so things are indented incorrectly. I tell you this because it was the commentor--Sara Harrison--whose mother died this summer. My mom died at the age of 59 in 1968. So it's been a long time but I feel she is still watching over me. And I hope that Sara feels that way about her mom.

      Blogging takes work and I think we all have a lives with many demands. So blogging has to sometimes take a back seat. Peace.

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  7. WELCOME BACK! I missed you and your stories! And you didn't miss much from my blog. I was gone from blogging for almost a year so I only have 2 new posts :) I'm so glad you are feeling better and all is well! I hope you get better and better each day and I can't wait for a new story of yours :)

    Sending hugs and good thoughts your way! :)

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    1. Dear Baiba, I've thought of you often as I've read about the refugee and migrant exodus to Europe. I've wondered whether these desperate people are being drawn to the Scandinavian countries and to Latvia. Are they?

      Are you back at the University? Studying hard? You inspire me with your youth and good will and your great curiosity about all of life. Peace.

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    2. We have very mixed feelings about those refugees but Latvia does plan to welcome a couple hundreds.

      And I'm at university yes. It started on September 1st. I got to go on a road trip to Germany before that! But now am being a good student. Well...a decent one!

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    3. Dear Baiba, I understand that the refugee/migrant exodus is bringing forth mixed feelings throughout Europe--for many reasons. Two hundred is so much better than none.

      Have a good year being a "decent" student!!! But perhaps your first word--good--is the more accurate one. Peace

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  8. Welcome back Dee. As you can see, you have been missed.
    You have a place reserved in so many of our hearts.

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    1. Dear Sue, thank you.

      Since 1996 I have kept a gratitude journal. Before turning off the lights each night, I write in that year's journal five things for which I am grateful that day. Tonight the journal entry will include the line "I am grateful for the friends who responded to my posting today."

      During the past ten months I have returned to several years: 1996, 97, and 98, as well as 2002, 3, 4--they were all years of change--and read for the next day what I was grateful for 19 years ago or 11 or whatever. By doing that, I became aware of just how blessed my life has been with friendship and health and good experiences. The bottom line that has lifted me from the doldrums several times is that I am one fortunate human being!!! Peace.

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  9. Welcome back to blogland, hopefully life stays normal for you now. Health issues are never fun at all.

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    1. Dear Pat, so good to see your name here. And I look forward to getting back to your blog and your sense of the ridiculous! Of course your love of cats has a lot to do with that! Peace.

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  10. What a wonderful surprise to see you here again. I'm taking a break now, but you know I can't stay away from blogging for long. I guess we just have to learn to pace ourselves. Much love. ~ Inger

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    1. Dear Inger, pacing is so important and I'm being forced by the facts of my life to pursue it. I hope your spirits remain good and that the grieving has become tempered by your good memories of Errol and the help of his family and your friends. Peace.

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  11. So good to read your words again, Dee. Whatever you wish to share will be well with my soul. I haven't posted a lot since last November, either. It's been a mixture of joy and my own health situation, which is about 97% resolved now. You are a welcome voice in the blogging universe.

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    1. Dear Deanna, I'm sorry to learn that you, too, have had health problems. I so hope that your reach the 100% resolution. Thank you for your kind words. Your philosophical and reflective postings always leave me thinking long thoughts, and I am always grateful that your words bring forth from me a new commitment to finding meaning in my life. Peace.

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  12. Dear Dee--What can I say that hasn't already been said? I've missed your posts & the wonderful way you have with the language. I hope your health issues are resolved. I am SO sorry I couldn't come to Elisa's wedding. I was looking forward to meeting you there. Post & read whenever you can. We are all happy (& willing) to wait for you!!

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    1. Dear Fran, I missed you at the wedding, which was both creative, personal, and lovely. The children played an important part and so it was truly a "family" wedding.

      It's Monday now and I meant to visit at least 10 blogs today, but that hasn't happened yet. I got busy on the memoir--the first time I've visited it in three weeks--and found it so engrossing (!?!?!) that I spent three hours and then suddenly realized I was pooped.

      So I've had lunch and now I'm going to rest awhile. Peace.

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  13. Welcome back Dee. We exchanged emails since March and I'm glad that you have reached a level of wellness that is bringing you back into the groove:)
    I have slowed down in my blogging to and also because health gets in the way at times but finally jere ther is also improvement for now.

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    1. Dear Heidrun, I hope your health improves as mine has--steadily. And I thank you for e-mailing me about my health and blogging since March. You have helped me decide, finally, to return to this world of friends beyond the confines of my home. Thank you. Peace.

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  14. Welcome back. I hope you'll be gradually feeling better. I'm sorry for the suffering you've had to bear these past months. You asked if there was any posting we'd like you to read. Perhaps this little review I posted on the occasion of the second anniversary of my blog would be of interest. http://nickichenwrites.com/wordpress/china/4129/

    Wishing you good health and peace.

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    1. Dear Nicki, I visited the posting you recommended and left a comment. I'll return to read some of your postings from the past two years. I'm wondering how you found my blog. That always amazing me--that people find what I'm writing. Peace.

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  15. Oh, Dee, I'm so happy to see you ha k. Have thought and worried about a d missed you so often. I'm delighted to see you writing again and so look forward to catching up!

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    1. Dear Kathy, thanks so much for visiting and being happy that I'm back. I hope your health has been good and that your book is selling well. What are you working on now? Maybe I'll find out when I visit your blog. Peace.

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  16. I'm here, too! I am so looking forward to your return to the blogosphere, Dee, and I know that you have indeed been missed. I am sorry to hear of all your health problems, but my heart soared when I saw the post from you, and now that you have returned, please know that I will be happy to read everything you write! Sending you and your furry family big hugs. :-)

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    1. Dear DJan, I've thought of you so often in the past months because one of my great-nieces is working in Seattle now. She's a nurse and goes around the country filling in for nurses in intensive care who are on maternity leave. She absolutely loves the Northwest and has gone camping and hiking all over the state. Ever time she posts photos of her mountain treks and the lakes and overlooks, I think of you and your photographs. My brother says that if he were younger--starting out again--he'd choose to live there because nature and mountains enthrall him.

      The cats thank you for the hugs and I thank you for your lovely response to my blogging again. Peace.

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  17. Pleased to see your blog come up in my reader this morning. Welcome back!

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    1. Dear Linda, it must be at least a year now since you moved back to Canada. I hope you are continuing to enjoy your retirement and your new life there. I'll visit your blog sometime this week if all goes well. Peace.

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  18. Well Hello Dee... SO SO SO good to hear from you. I have not been very good at blogging lately either. Life gets in the way ---so the blogging takes a back seat. Sorry about your health problems --but hope that things are better and that you are able to start anew...

    Both George and I are fine --and working very hard on our health and exercise... Walking a lot helps us both so much --but it takes time and determination to do it. I try to average over 10,000 steps per day... AND--we spend as much time buying healthy foods and trying to eat healthy. I spend more time on Facebook than I do blogging these days because it's easier and quicker... BUT--I still enjoy blogging and will probably never it up totally...

    We just got home not too long ago from a wonderful trip to the Tetons and Yellowstone --one of our favorite places in the country... Awesome trip..

    Continued prayers for you --and I'm glad to hear from you.
    Hugs,
    Betsy

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    1. Dear Betsy, off and on throughout these ten months one of your photographs has appeared on my computer and I've thought of you each time and wondered where you and George were planning to go next. I have some friends camping right now in Yellowstone. It's a place I've always wanted to visit.

      Take care of yourself. Good health is such a blessing. Like you, I'm working on getting up to 10,000 steps a day. Peace.

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  19. Welcome back!!!


    Linda
    http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com

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    1. Dear Linda, so good to hear from you. I think of you each time I have a salad. Why? Because I always have a half cup or more of cooked beans with my greens and I so remember those beans you sent me. I hope all is well and that farming continues to bring you contentment. Peace.

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  20. So glad to see a post from you!! Sorry to hear of all the health issues, though. I hope the worst has passed. Glad to see you back!!

    I have moved into the dream apartment I had prayed for. Still unpacking and organizing the last room. (Yes, I got the one bedroom with the den and will have an art&craft room!) The packing and unpacking has been going on since the beginning of May and that is also when my folks were in a terrible car accident down in Florida. My dad died instantly (was a blessing with all his health issues) and my mom had a rough go of it (more due to a terrible rehab place) for almost four months. She finally got out of the second rehab place and came up to Minnesota and has been staying with my brother and his wife. She plans to visit us in Fargo on October 10th before she returns to Florida on the 18th.

    My grandson, Ian, is doing well and just started walking last week. Karma adjusted to the move much better than any of us expected. Life is good. I am sore and exhausted, but so thrilled to be here in my new home. I just love it here, Dee! I think that should catch you up on things in Fargo so don't worry about going back and reading my blog. :)

    Just glad to know you're okay! Love and hugs!!

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    1. Dear Rita, I am so---so---so--so--so happy to learn that you are in that apartment you longed for. How wonderful. Is it closer to your son and his family? Are they able to come and visit as often and help you out and are you able to visit them and watch Ian grow.

      I'm glad to learn that Karma adjusted to the move. Cats become even more attached than we do to place. For Karma, I think "place" means----YOU.

      Peace ever and always.

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  21. Welcome back, Dee! And congratulations on resuming your life after your health issues. We are all in this together, aren't we?

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    1. Dear Linda, yes we are all in this together. All growing older and learning what that means. I'm wondering if you and your husband are going to be headed to the Southwest again this winter. You've so enjoyed that and it's introduced you to new things. How is the work as a mediator going? Peace.

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  22. It is so good to hear from you again, Dee!

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    1. Dear Mary Beth, I never realized--or at least I don't remember realizing--that you knew I had a blog and that you read it. This is such a happy surprise. I so hope to get up to Minnesota next year. Perhaps, if you'd like, we could meet for lunch. I'd like that. Peace.

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  23. Oh Dee I was so happy to see a post from you in my emails, yes you have been missed and we have all worried about you health problems suck and I do get the weary feeling I have had more then my share of days when I feel weary lately. Take life one day at a time, and remember when one day is so bloody hard the next might night be hard at all, all we can do is keep on plugging away one day at a time

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    1. Dear Jo-Anne, I've missed your five things for Friday series. I write five things each night for which I'm grateful. I've been doing this since 1996 when I bought my first spiral notebook for writing before bed each night. That became my first Gratitude Journal. I'm now on the one for 2015.

      And yes, taking one day at a time is surely a good way to live. I try doing that--as well as living in the present moment--but so often I slip into old habits of stewing about tomorrow.

      Take care and you're right--we just need to keep on "truckin'"! Peace.

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  24. I'm sorry you haven't been well. It's always a pleasant surprise to see you.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Dear Janie, it's good to hear from you. I'm so much better now than I was a few weeks ago and the vacation in Utah helped. Although I came home exhausted, it was a happy time. Peace.

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  25. Hi Dee, welcome back! I was so happy to see that you're posting again. You were missed. I've often wondered about you, but I assumed that you were taking a blogging break, which I've needed myself from time to time. I'm sorry to hear that your time away had to do with your heath, but thank God you're feeling better now. It's such good news.

    I am looking forward to seeing more of your posts. Blessings to you, my friend... :)

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    1. Dear Dee, so good to hear from you. Thank you for the blessings. Just being able to blog again is a blessing in itself. Peace.

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  26. I'm glad your life is getting back to normal. I took health for granted when I was young and foolish. I now realize our stay here on this earth is woefully short.
    Rick

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  27. Dear Rick, I took health for granted much longer than the time when I was both young and foolish. Even as I've become old and foolish, I've thought that my good health would continue until I was 102! Peace.

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  28. Dear Dee
    I was filled with happiness when I read your comment on my blog and I realize you have turned another corner. Many up's and down's in our lives .....like a roller coaster. Often we enjoy the thrills and sometimes "not'. So many friends waiting to welcome you back. You are loved.

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    1. Dear Manzanita, both of us are doing what's advised. We "keep on truckin'"!!!! It's good to know that we are together in our love of life. Peace.

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  29. Dee, i'm so happy you visited my blog. I missed seeing you there. Now I know the reason. I'm doubly happy that now you're on the upswing and back to good health. Continue taking care of yourself, and I look forward to many more visits and conversations.

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    1. Dear Carol, thanks for the good wishes. You know you've written so many novels and that's so impressive to me. I have three manuscripts for novels--one completed and two in first draft but they languish on the computer!!!! I need to light a fire under myself. Peace.

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  30. First of all Welcome back. Also I am so thrilled to see you write. I am also happy that all is well with you.
    I used to write on a regular basis and therefore read on a regular basis too. Since I have taken a new job, I hardly go on blogger, may be write once a month. the driving is very time consuming and stressful so when I come home, I feel like doing only the essential things and of course my own hobby never counted as essential. I am hoping that I will be able to read your entries often enough.
    Please take care of yourself.
    Peace
    -Munir

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    1. Dear Munir, thanks so much for coming by when you are clearly busy. I've discovered that even a little busy-ness makes me very tired. That's why I didn't blog at all this past year. I had so many doctors' appointments and therapy and recuperation that I was simply tired from being busy with health! So I surely understand doing "the essential things" and blogging, while enjoyable, is for me a nonessential. I so missed all the friends I'd made but I had to take time to listen to my body--that was the essential thing in this past year.

      And now, I'm in the midst of completing a memoir and so that has become essential. I hope to post perhaps once or twice a month and to read blogs once or twice also. But everything will depend on what my body tells me. Because what I've learned--finally!!!!!--is to listen to my body. It has my best interests at heart. Peace.

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  31. I'm so sorry to hear that you have been ill, and for such a long time. I was wondering what had happened when months went by without seeing a post from you. I hope that you continue to get your strength and health back.
    We have been very fortunate to not have the flooding that is all around us in South Carolina. Things are very wet but the causeway to our island never flooded and our house remains dry. The tides have been extremely high and for the last two days we have had more rain. Thanks for your concern.

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    1. Dear Cynthia, thanks so much for stopping by. And I'm relieved to learn that you've been fortunate and that there's been no flooding near you. I live in tornado country, not in hurricane as you do. Both natural wind tunnels convince me that at any moment life can change. Take care. Peace.

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  32. So glad to see you're blogging again Dee. I asked about you on my blog a few months ago too. You were missed! Blessings and peace to you.

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    1. Dear Bill, such a treat to have you come and comment. Several times during the past months--when the lawn was green and my neighbor's garden was fruitful--I thought of you and the goats and farming. I hope all is well. Peace.

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  33. It's so nice to find you here again. Continuing to send you love and light.

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    1. Dear Deb, I'm back, but I'm so immersed in finishing my convent memoir that I'm mostly just treading water with regard to e-mails and posting. I'm an avid baseball fan and the team I support is in the ALCS right now, so I'm also immersed in cheering them and watching them play. Friday or Saturday will be exciting as one of the two teams will win the best of 7 and go on to the World Series! Peace.

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  34. So great to see you back! I look forward to reading your posts once more!

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    1. Dear Susan, and it's so great to be reading your stories again. Tomorrow i will finish the 4th draft of my convest memoir. Next Monday I hope to start really reading blogs each week! It's great to have health again. Peace.

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